Sunday, 16 February 2014

TO SHAVE OR NOT TO it all a man's fault?

My hubby found this article and was again upset about the fact that women are blaming men for all the horrid things we do to our bodies to please them. I shall pop the link in here and share with you the story, and my honest reply.

I would be curious to hear your thoughts on this.........

"It seems the Brazilian is over with its less appreciated cousin, the fur coat, back in the game. With proud bushes sprouting up everywhere from American Apparel to Lena Dunham's Girls to photographic projects and even Cameron Diaz’s debut book, the free-and-easy look is de jour once more.

I can’t remember the first time I endured the torture of a bikini wax. I imagine I blocked the experience from my memory as a means of warding off PTSD.

Because no matter what your pubic stylist tells you, it does not become less painful with time. The hair does not grow back thinner and finer, as if with enough visits you’ll suddenly find that it all disappears in a puff of smoke. You do not get “four to six weeks” of respite until wispy fuzz begins to appear on the common. Your pubes will not return as a fine layer of powdered snow on a gentle ground cast glistening under the stillness of a winter’s starry sky.

Artist Petra Collins was deleted from Instagram because of this image of a model with, shock, public hair. Image via
Artist Petra Collins was deleted from Instagram because of this image of a model with, shock, pubic hair. Image via

If you’re lucky, you’ll get four to six days of hairlessness that, while temporarily smooth, makes your downstairs look like a plucked spatchcock.

But look, that’s just my experience. And far be it from me to advise other women against it. Hair, or the lack thereof, is a personal choice. Strip yourself bare or go full wilderness - whatever makes you happy. It’s your spatchcock, after all.

And so while I personally embrace news that the Brazilian torture industry is on its way out, I’m less enthusiastic about the reasons why. Unfortunately, attempts to reinstate the popularity of hair while redefining it as fashionable are just as silly as previous attempts to make it Verboten - especially when that advocacy is coming from companies whose ultimate goal is to make money.

Sure, American Apparel’s creative director sounds good when she says, “everybody’s got it all backward. Pubic hair isn’t a trend, removing it is. It’s like everybody’s suddenly acting like having hair is a new idea.”

Isn’t that refreshingly progressive? I mean, doesn’t that just sound like American Apparel is the kind of au naturale company that loves women and supports their natural bodies? And wouldn’t those natural bodies just look so great in the ‘semitransparent mesh lingerie’ American Apparel are selling for Valentine’s Day? It’s not as if American Apparel has had a heinous history of sexualising women’s bodies, or being dictatorial about the limited expressions of beauty demanded in their retail staff.

The problem with taking a fairly mundane activity - in this case, removing or growing hair that naturally appears on your pubic area in varying levels of ferocity - and fetishising a particular expression of it is that it still forces women to operate in the shame economy that is the beauty industry.

Instead of allowing them to live in their bodies as they see fit, free of judgment from others, their choices are still up for discussion by people with exactly zero to do with them.

Now we have well respected, progressive comics like Rob Delaney saying he was ‘horrified’ when he first saw a bald vagina - as if the contemplation of women’s bodies by men has been a field sorely underrepresented.

Meanwhile, the natural look is now being lauded as the domain of ‘eco- and health-minded women’, with Angela Kia Kim (owner of Savor Spa in the West Village) telling the New York Times, ‘the grown look certainly suits a girl who is more au naturel’. Because how you treat your pubic hair is clearly a reflection on your depth and values as a human being - especially when accompanied by the kind of class privilege that can see you afford regular visits to an upmarket New York spa.

In or out, proud or shrouded, I don’t care. It’s just hair and what you choose to do with it has no reflection on your worth as a person. As long as that choice is being informed by your desires and no one else’s, who cares whether or not you like to lay naked in the wind or hide your light under a bushel?"

So that was the story........... here is what hubby said..............

"Check this out for a complete non-story! And of course, men are to blame! Again!"

So I replied................

The women in the comments section, did have men in their lives that were of the liking of a hair free snatch. And some men do enjoy a hairless fanny, but in truth I think most men really don't care. Porn pushed the alien look, and people have become a accustomed to seeing that as normal and what is considered beautiful. Let's face it..... A LOT of women in porn are Beautiful Fit Hot looking women.......That is why you watch right? No man wants to see the average woman (aka) someone who looks like me for example rip her clothes off and do the business with anyone......not even I want to see that! But the article was not blaming Men. It was more having a go and the fashion industry. In the 80's the Mullet hair cut was considered hot. A man with a mullet was what we all wanted , YES? (and no I never liked it even back then!) Now 30 years later we look back and say WHAT WAS EVERYONE ON? It was YUCK. But it was fashion, and everyone was doing it, and so it was accepted truth. The Brazilian is the same fashion trendy thing. I never saw the beauty in it, I think a neat trimmed bush is sexy, but that is just me. I also think men should have pubic hair, and body hair. Men should not shave their legs unless they have a sport reason to do so, and unless you have wall to wall carpet all over your body, don't do anything. YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE A WOMAN!

So no, men are not to blame. Fashion trends and clever marketing are. The men and women who took on the trend are no different to the anyone who buys goods because someone tells them that without it you will not be happy, your life will suck, and all awesome things will come your way if you do....and wait there is more, they will also thrown in a curling iron and no extra price!

Personally I always wondered about how long that look lasted. And if you have ever had a bikini wax you will understand that it is not the most pleasant experiences on this world. If you have very sensitive soft thin skin in that area , you can be left bleeding and with bruising.... which I have experienced each time I have attempted a wax both professionally and on my own. Less trauma when done by the professionals, but damage all the same, which is why the thought of going all the way made me think it was just a world of pain I didn't want to experience. Then the itches. I have imagines women scratching like grown hairs too.....OUCH! Then prickly hair growing back....would that leave a type of pash rash in reverse?? Maybe that's just me over thinking. 

 But answer me this honestly..........Would you agree that most women want to look attractive to a man? They actually want to be desired, called pretty, beautiful, we try and do whatever we can to make sure we stay within the structure of what is deem acceptable beauty. Lets be honest....I have never heard anyone say....(either men or women).........Look at a woman of average size and fitness, with upper lip hair (all be it fine hair), dark hairy legs, untrimmed pubes that are escaping out of her bikini bottoms, and when she lifts her arms up in the air, huge thick bushes of dark hair are making cloud puffs in her arm pits! NO I HAVE NEVER HEARD ANYONE SAY NICE THINGS ABOUT A NATURAL WOMAN. Society shuns them. It would make no difference if she is the most perfect woman on the planet......a man would not see past the shell.

So we all and women..... have become accustomed to grooming in a particular way that is accepted as OK in the mainstream suburbia. We all want to be liked. I wonder how man found women hot in the caveman time period? But this is not new fashion. Women have removed their hair to be beautiful since the days of Cleopatra, and before that too. Men like the way we look when hair is gone from out face and arm pits and legs. It makes us look less like a man. We like the look too. So it is a win win. I wonder what would happen when no more razors, tweezers, and wax were around, and everyone was forced to go about as they were always meant to look. Wouldn't we all look hairy and scary. lol  I wonder if we would still find ourselves attractive then?

Tuesday, 11 February 2014

Please Vote:

My Hubby  has entered an on line model competition and he needs votes. So if you could spare 5 secs to pop over to the link below, like the site and vote for him I would very much appreciate it.  Please feel free to share the links to help him get the votes he needs. He has worked really hard on this and he deserves something good.  THANK YOU 


My Me-262 plastic model has been entered into an online vote competition so I need as many votes as I can get! The site is here:

My model can be found here:


Holy crap can we just wipe out the last few days please............................

It has been an emotional roller coaster the past few days. For many reasons, and hence why I have been so vacant around here.

I am going to vent a little, cause I am female, and we vent, it's what we do....what can I say , it is like art really...... but I don't what to dwell on the negative and forget that life isn't still full of positive good nice things too.

 My hubby came home from work the other night, and decided to ask our teenage daughter some deep questions. This came from his basic love for his daughter. A dad looking out for his kid, and making sure that she wasn't getting herself into something that was going to hurt her. She has already had 1 serious relationship, which wasn't good, and just after a 3 month stint at being single, threw herself into another. This boy we have met only 3 times. We hear only what comes out of Missy's mouth, and a lot of what she says is very much a cause for alarm for us. So basically he was trying to find out what her self worth was, and whether she thought this relationship, and all that it has to offer, was what she thought she deserved.

 Well, what then came from our daughters mouth, was something neither of us expected. What it all boiled down to was that she blames us for being POOR. She blames us for living in a RENTED HOUSE. She is ASHAMED to bring her friends over because it is TOO BORING here. She is a shamed of the WORK we do, and resents us both having to work evenings for 2 years 5 years ago, forcing her to babysit her little brothers, which we struggled to put food on the table. She HATES that my back is fucked, wishes her brother didn't have ADHD, and basically if she could afford to she would move out.

 Let me point out that the new boyfriend is what we would call RICH. Already has investments in his own home, and is working long hours in the building trade, and has a bright future a head. His mother is dating a millionaire, who owns his own small island. His dad and his new wife (#3) are in real estate. Get the picture. But this boy, only sees our daughter when it suits him. calls her when it suits him, and many a time she has been annoyed because he has ignored her on face book, but chatted to mutual friends. She just doesn't seem like a young woman in LOVE?? He has told her he'd like to be a father one day, but now is not that time, and should she fall pregnant , he would insist on her having an abortion. The family is different to ours. Not just money status, but moral. They poke fun at people for amusement. Racists really. They do not have issues with under age drinking/ partying....they are just different. NOT BAD, just not like us.

 Since dating this boy, our daughter is changing. She is turning into someone we don't like much, which as a parent is scary. How can you not like your own child? But the blow she hit has been a deep wound, and has hurt both of us very much.  I have no idea what happened to our beautiful baby girl? Nor do I know if she will ever come back?  

 Kids! you try so hard , you give them all you can, and they are still never happy. Our boys are hard done by because I insist they shower everyday, and brush there teeth! Man what is it with boys and not wanting to wash?
Every night it's the same battle. FFS so over it! 

 The other night I thought I would escape the world and run a bath....

I had been trying to find my own space since coming home from work. Finally I leave child 3 watching Willy Wonka and go run myself a nice bubble bath. I figured since I have been able to again pop on my own socks and shoes again,  ( YES ...just this week!!) I would tackle the forest growing on my legs. leg done...................MUM....MUM....oh you are having a bath...can I hop in too... (as he is already getting undressed)

No....I am shaving my legs, and trying to relax.......

Too late he is in....and water in going all over the floor...

So he pulls the plug...............OUT........then freaks because the bath water is going down the drain..................

I sort that great awkward expense...then finish my leg, and get out so he can have the bath to himself.

1 min later he is in my room dripping wet and asking what I am doing now........ lol

 This morning it was let's argue with mum over whether we have brushed our teeth and hair. Might be more effective if you have actually done it, and your hair is neat, and the chocolate milk around your mouth is actually gone! Child nil , mum 1. 

 Then I get home make a cup of tea and sit by the computer to relax, in a hubby free, child free zone........


Cat wants to have wants picks up cat and strokes cat affectionately and realises cat has some very smelly dried muck stuck down side of rump. GROSS!

Now have you ever tried to wash an unwilling cat?

Let's just say I won, and cat is now happy licking his clean rump outside in the sun, with not so much as a THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

 Right, so now your thinking I am free to chill and catch up on my space, my peace, my  free mummy time.....

Well I could have been, but I am a Virgo, and we need to be up to date and organised. We got a letter from the Tax office with some basic details wrong. So I called them to correct things............... 45 mins later, paper work all over the floor, 2 phones calls to the Tax Office and 1 to our accountant, and let's just say I am back to where I started.

So after hanging up, I fell completely apart. My tea was now cold. I was emotionally fucked, my head was thumping, and I just let go. I just cried... Too much bullshit for this girl in one week.

kids back chatting, constant shopping, working, cleaning, bill paying, worrying, stressing, heat, no sex life, and just getting the feeling that life is slowly fucking you over........

So I was my last resort.....which woke up a very tired and run down hubby, who hasn't been well, because he has been stressed too, and working long hours and not getting much sleep, thanks to life, and this bloody heat wave we are  having.

Nothing is better than sharing the load with a friend, and after a long stressful discussion we are both on page with what to do next which is good, despite the way we had to get there. But sometimes bad things actually turn out to be good......

Now hubby is back in bed, and I am about to go to the pool for my Hydro session, which is proving to be wonderful.

Back from Hydro..... the pool was divine. So relaxing to end the session with a nice float on a noodle, then a quick dip. Peace. Just the sound of the water lapping at my ears. Cool sweet water, on such a hot day. BLISS!

Get back home and my nice clean sink is full of dishes. Missy made herself lunch. Nothing wrong with that, just clean up after yourself. Now she is back off to work for the second half of her spilt shift. I asked her to clean up after herself , she said she would, but face book was more important. I shall leave it and see how long it will take?? Trouble is she used the main pot. She made PASTA. could have made a batch for everyone, considering her father is sick, and I am running on fumes, and she was home during the whole TAX phone call.....but no.............Miss I only think of myself, and never bother to say THANK YOU is too high above us....unless she needs a lift to work!

Sorry, long, long day..... boys home , hot and sweaty, and grumpy, and we have a school acquaintance night to go to, and hubby is not feeling really well at he is going back to bed, in the hopes that he can handle his shift at work tonight. So I shall be tackling that one on my own, (well with child 3, because child 2 & 3 are hell bent on not getting along this afternoon) which is fine, but seriously, once you have been to 1 you really don't need to go to any more. It is nothing  that can not be popped into a newsletter..... just saying!

The other good news I wanted to share was that I have discovered a support group on face book with women who share my condition of PCOS. (Poly-cystic ovarian syndrome.) I am learning so much. Mainly why I haven't been able to loose weight despite all my good eating habits. So with just a few small changes to the diet, and I mean small, I have not gone full hard core as I have a family and they would not enjoy the food I would have to eat, I wouldn't much either....but the point is I have started to slim down. I am over the moon about it. I am not talking huge weight loss, but it's only been 3 weeks.....but enough that I noticed my work uniform is starting to become loose. So I shall keep up the new eating style, and see if this continues. The ladies are a wonderful bunch, and it is nice swapping ideas, and sharing experiences.

A friend of mine sent me these lovely pics last night in an email, and I thought they were just wonderful. 

Well depending on where you are stay cool, or warm...and enjoy the Olympic games. I very much like the figure skating, but whenever I tune in it seems to be men skiing down huge slopes fast. 

And if you are that way inclined enjoy valentines day on Friday.
We do not celebrate valentines day.

I feel it is commercial, and much prefer a sweet gesture when the mood strikes rather than a day of the year dictating when and how.

But if it rocks your world enjoy.

Now back out into the heat to  attend 2 hours of meet and greet between the two boys classes.

Then home to eat, and hopefully chill. I think an early night is on the cards tonight.